When Parents Complain: Why a Good Complaints Procedure Builds Stronger Relationships

We all know that strong parent relationships are at the heart of excellent early education. But as you know, those relationships aren’t always easy. Despite your best efforts, there will be times when a parent or carer feels let down and decides to make a complaint.

It’s never pleasant. Whether it’s about a lost jumper, a missed message, or something more serious, complaints can feel personal, especially when you’re already working flat out. But here’s the truth: a clear, fair, and well-communicated complaints process doesn’t just protect your setting, it can help repair trust and even strengthen relationships in the long run.

A strong system matters.

The way you handle complaints speaks volumes. If parents feel heard and see that their concerns are taken seriously, it becomes easier to move forward, even when you don’t agree. On the other hand, if your procedure is unclear or inconsistent, even a minor issue can escalate into something much more difficult to manage.

So, does your school or setting have a robust complaints system in place? Use the checklist below to reflect:

✅ A complaints form. Do you have a standard form for parents to complete, so everything is documented in writing?

✅ A log for complaints. Are complaints recorded and stored securely, helping to identify patterns or recurring issues?

✅ A designated complaints coordinator. Is someone responsible for overseeing how complaints are managed and followed up?

✅ A straightforward complaints procedure. Is there a written policy that outlines each step of the process?

✅ A recent review. When was the last time your complaints procedure was reviewed? Is it up to date and still fit for purpose?

✅ Parent feedback. Have you ever asked parents for their thoughts on the complaints process? Their perspective can be valuable.

✅ Updates for parents. Do you make sure parents who’ve raised concerns are kept informed of progress and outcomes?

✅ Staff training. Have your staff had training on handling complaints calmly and constructively?

✅ Staff awareness. Is every member of staff, not just senior leaders, confident about what to do if a parent raises a concern?

✅ Publicity. Is the procedure easy for parents to find? Is it included in welcome packs, displayed on your website, or mentioned during induction?

A shared understanding

Managing complaints well isn’t about ticking boxes or avoiding blame. It’s about creating a culture of openness, where feedback is welcomed and handled professionally, even when it’s difficult.

Most of all, it’s about understanding. Many parents who raise concerns aren’t trying to cause trouble; they’re tired, worried, or unsure how things work. And most educators aren’t being careless or defensive; they’re under pressure, juggling a dozen responsibilities at once.

When you recognise the human side on both ends, you’re already halfway to a resolution.

A final thought

No system will stop complaints altogether, and that’s okay. What matters is how your setting responds. A well-handled complaint can be a turning point, not just in that relationship, but in your whole approach to partnership with families.

If you haven’t reviewed your complaints process in a while, now might be a good time to do so. Even small changes can make a big difference for your staff, your parents, and most importantly, your children.

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