Speaking Up: What to Expect if You Need to Raise a Concern at Nursery or School

As parents, we all want the best for our children, and when something doesn’t feel right at nursery, school, or with a key worker, it’s only natural to speak up. But raising a concern can be daunting. You might worry about being seen as difficult or not wanting to cause trouble. You might even wonder whether your concern is “worth” mentioning at all.

The truth is, most settings welcome feedback, including complaints. Whether your concern is about communication, safety, fairness, or just a gut feeling that something’s off, you have every right to raise it. And when there’s a clear, fair process for dealing with complaints, it helps everyone stay focused on what matters most: your child’s wellbeing and learning.

It's okay to speak up.

Raising a concern doesn’t mean you’re attacking a teacher’s professionalism or causing conflict. In fact, many educators appreciate it when parents speak up early, before a small issue becomes a bigger problem.

What really helps is how the complaint is handled, and for that, schools and nurseries need to have sound systems in place.

Here’s what a strong complaints process should include:

• A clear way to raise your concern. You should be able to write it down or discuss it with someone in confidence.
• Someone who takes responsibility. Most settings have a designated person (often a senior staff member) to make sure complaints are taken seriously and followed up on.
• Updates. If you raise a concern, you should receive a response, even if the issue takes time to resolve. A response like “we’re looking into this and will come back to you by Friday” can go a long way.
• A fair process. You should feel heard, not judged. The setting should take time to understand what happened and what outcome you're hoping for.
• Clarity and transparency. You should know where to find the complaints procedure: on the website, in welcome packs, or through your child’s key person or teacher.

Why this matters

When schools and nurseries handle complaints well, it doesn’t just fix a problem; it builds trust. It shows that the setting values your voice, takes your concerns seriously, and wants to work with you, not against you.

And let’s be honest, it works both ways. Staff are under pressure too, juggling multiple responsibilities and doing their best. Sometimes what feels like a big issue to a parent might be a misunderstanding or a result of stretched resources. A calm, respectful conversation can clear up a lot.

What you can do

If something’s bothering you:

• Start small. Can you speak to your child’s key worker or class teacher first? Often, they’ll appreciate the chance to address the issue informally.
• Be specific. Share exactly what happened, how it made you or your child feel, and what outcome you’re hoping for.
• Ask about the complaints process. It’s okay to request a copy of the setting’s complaints policy or ask who to speak to next.
• Give feedback. If something went well (even during a complaint!), let them know. This encourages openness and improvement for everyone.

In the end…

Raising a complaint can feel uncomfortable, but it’s a constructive step when done properly. Schools and nurseries can’t fix what they don’t know about, and most genuinely want to work in partnership with parents.

Your voice matters. When we speak up, kindly, clearly, and with mutual respect, we create stronger relationships that support our children in thriving.